


Someone Else's Dance; or, The Symbiont Blues

by boyproblems



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Angst, But no one dies, Ezris just anxious, F/F, He brews it, Hey how does Moses make his tea, This is so fucking short!, but it'll get longer. I think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-08 21:09:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12262137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boyproblems/pseuds/boyproblems
Summary: That's never going to get any less weird, is it? Referring to people you barely know with a bizarre sort of sentimental intimacy, knowing everyone's life story inside and out like they were characters in some old book your brother owned, living on the notions of a life that was never yours and was never meant to be yours.





	Someone Else's Dance; or, The Symbiont Blues

**Author's Note:**

> Shoutout and thanks to friends Emily kiradaxlover69, Bruce, Levi, and literally everyone for proofing, reading, supporting my obsession with Star Trek, and listening to me talk about this literally incessantly for the past day.  
> Also thanks DS9 for the depression.

Two months in.

Jesus.

You're two months into your time on DS9 and you- hell, that makes it sound more like you’d been given a prison sentence than a generous offer for a great posting from your oldest friend.

Real poetic, Ezri.

_Your oldest friend._

That's never going to get any less weird, is it? Referring to people you barely know with a bizarre sort of sentimental intimacy, knowing everyone's life story inside and out like they were characters in some old book your brother owned, living on the notions of a life that was never yours and was never meant to be yours.

Moping about it isn't going to make it any better, either.

But, that's what you do best- you overthink, you worry until delusion and reality are on the same ugly, ugly plane in your shitty brain. You can barely keep your own lid on, much less help anyone else on the station with their problems.

You know you're blowing things out of proportion, but it just feels like everyone else is so much older and so much further along than you are. It's like everyone knows exactly what they're doing except for you.

Anyway, just get to what's really bothering you- it's not like anyone will ever read these besides you. _Minus Starfleet Command, if you're ever court martialed, but you doubt they’d give a shit about your unfortunate crush._

You can deal with the awkwardness with Worf, Benjamin’s as warm as always, and Julian's weird flirting is only a _little_ annoying. It's Nerys- you mean Kira- who gets to you. You know how close she was with Jadzia, you know that she probably loved Jadzia- and that's what makes it so uncomfortable. Every time she smiles you have a crisis over whether that weirdly nice feeling of utter uselessness is from Ezri Tigan, Jadzia Dax, or some awful amalgamation of both. Why is this so important to you?


End file.
